Q I am a 23 year old college student and my boyfriend lives out of town. The problem is, he is too possessive. He won't allow me talking with other man on the phone or even on Facebook. Every time he calls, he demands to know where I have been, with whom and for how long. Last time, he wouldn't stop shouting over the phone when he had male voices in my room.
I love him and I have always been honest, but I don't think I can stand him any more. I feel like I am a chicken trapped in a cage. What should I do to make him understand? Should I face him directly and tell him he is being childish?
A I think go ahead, tell him how you feel BUT... don't tell him he is being childish.
Possessiveness is sometimes bad, but in your instance I think it is good. At least he shows he is in love with you. Only that it is resulting from his insecurity - fear of losing you (don't you think he has seen it happen? What about his past, doesn't it have a heartbreak story?).
The best way to talk to him is to first tell him that you understand his fears, and assure him that long distance won't make you love him any less. Also tell him how much you need his trust now more than ever, because trust has some spiritual power in it, to keep people strong.
Wish you all the best
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